Your person - your "go to" person

Who is your “go to” person? You know, the first one you think of and want to share good new or bad news? The one, heaven forbid, you would call if you head for the car and realize you've had one too many. Or on that day when a big black pick-up trick with roofing ladders sticking out of the back comes over into your lane on Route 2 South just before College Parkway and you lean on the horn and swear into the median a little, but you’re not hurt and the car is fine but your heart is pounding; that one person who will be as invested as you are in your dreams, the minutia of your life.

I used to know the answer to that question. Now, I don’t even know how to answer the question. And I didn’t see it change. Just one day, I almost got run off the road and there was no one to call. Don’t misunderstand; I have two wonderful children who would help if I needed help, and brothers and a sister who would help, and many friends who care about me. But the question is really about who we are compelled to reach.

Once upon a time, it was my mother, then my first love, and after some time my children. Then a very dear friend for many years was the one. And now, I just shake my head. And I keep some things to myself.

Sometimes it feels like I’m collecting them, like fossils to be discovered at a later date.